Sometimes, pursuing your passion feels like screaming into an empty abyss. You pour your heart and soul into something meaningful, yet the world responds with deafening silence. It’s disheartening, it’s frustrating, and it’s enough to make anyone question their path. I know this feeling all too well.

Recently, someone close to me sent an email that cut deep. They acknowledged my talents and creativity but followed it with a litany of my shortcomings: being reactive, burning bridges, exuding desperation. They said, “You can’t keep doing the same things you’ve been doing and expect different outcomes.” It stung because, deep down, I knew there was truth in their words.

I took it personally—who wouldn’t? But it also forced me to reflect. Yes, I’ve struggled. Yes, I’ve made mistakes. But I’ve also been tirelessly working to change, to break free from a career that no longer fulfills me.

The Unseen Struggle Behind the Scenes

What many don’t see are the countless hours and immense effort I’ve invested in transforming my life:

• Exploring Inner Depths: I attended Ayahuasca ceremonies to confront my fears and seek clarity.
• Healing and Growth: I became certified in breathwork, launching a business to help others heal.
• Embracing Innovation: I taught myself how to build an AI-powered app, pushing beyond my comfort zone.
• Creating Aurelda: I birthed Aurelda, a universe of unapologetic self-expression and spiritual exploration for queer men and spiritual seekers.

Despite these efforts, gaining traction felt like an uphill battle. At times, the digital landscape seemed rigged—algorithms favoring those with massive followings, leaving passionate creators like myself shouting into the void. Social media platforms that once offered organic reach now felt like gated communities, making it harder to break through, no matter how authentic or well-crafted the message.

When Doubt Creeps In

I’ve questioned myself repeatedly:

• “Is my work not good enough?”
• “Are the AI-generated artworks too artificial?”
• “Why isn’t anyone engaging with my content?”

Yet, whenever I engage with people one-on-one, their reactions are overwhelmingly positive. They say things like, “Wow, this is amazing!” and show genuine interest. The disconnect isn’t in the value of my work; it’s in the barriers that prevent it from reaching those who would appreciate it.

The Pain of Invisibility

There’s a unique pain in feeling unseen. You strive to offer something authentic and meaningful, but it feels like the world isn’t listening. It’s easy to internalize this silence as a reflection of your worth, but that’s a dangerous trap.

Social media metrics have become the yardstick for success, but they don’t measure impact. They don’t capture the lives touched in subtle, profound ways that don’t translate into likes or shares.

Why It Still Matters

So, why keep going when the path is so arduous?

Because authenticity matters. Because voices that challenge the status quo are needed now more than ever. Because even if one person feels seen or inspired by my work, that’s a victory.

Creating Aurelda wasn’t just a passion project; it was a lifeline—for me and for others seeking a space where they could fully be themselves. It’s about building a community that embraces vulnerability, spirituality, and unapologetic self-expression.

What I’m Doing About It

I’m choosing to move forward, embracing both the struggle and the beauty of this journey. Here’s how:

1. Letting Go of the “Safe” Path: I’m stepping away from work that drains me, even if it offers financial stability. Safety shouldn’t come at the cost of your soul.
2. Embracing Vulnerability: I’m sharing my story openly, acknowledging my mistakes and fears. Vulnerability isn’t weakness; it’s a powerful connector.
3. Reclaiming My Narrative: I’m owning my story, flaws and all. Aurelda is an extension of my truth, and I won’t dilute it to fit mainstream expectations.
4. Building Genuine Connections: I’m focusing on one-on-one interactions, fostering real relationships rather than chasing vanity metrics.
5. Persisting Despite Obstacles: I’m committed to showing up consistently, believing that perseverance will eventually break through the noise.

A Message to Fellow Dreamers

“To let ourselves be seen, deeply seen, vulnerably seen; to love with our whole hearts, even though there’s no guarantee—that’s the courage to be vulnerable.” — Brené Brown, Ph.D.

If you feel like you’re shouting into the void, know that you’re not alone. The path of authenticity is rarely easy, but it’s undeniably worth it. Your voice has the power to inspire, to challenge, and to bring about change—even if the impact isn’t immediately visible.

Don’t measure your worth by the world’s response. Measure it by the integrity of your actions and the truth of your expression.

Final Thoughts

Yes, following your passion can feel like an uphill battle against an indifferent world. But every step you take is a testament to your courage and commitment. Keep shouting into the void, because somewhere out there, someone is listening—and they need to hear exactly what you have to say.

5 Ways You Can Join Me on This Journey

If any of this resonates with you, I invite you to explore Aurelda. Together, we can build a community that values authenticity over appearance, depth over superficiality.

1. Explore Aurelda, Visit: Aurelda.com
2. Support: Consider becoming a patron to help bring more stories to life.
3. Start a Healing Journey: Download “Awaken Your Power,” a transformative guided breathwork journey.
4. Read the Ebook: Aurelda: Echoes of the Ceiba An epic queer spiritual journey of love, transformation, and ancient wisdom.
5. Connect: Join our Discord community to share your thoughts and connect with like-minded individuals.

Resources

• 5 Steps to Beating Self-Doubt by Amy Morin, PsychologyToday.com, November 10, 2015
• 8 Things to Tell Yourself When You Feel Like a Failure by Amy Morin, PsychologyToday.com, October 30, 2016
• Shedding More Light on How Instagram Works by Adam Mosseri, CEO of Instagram, June 8, 2021
• Feeling Invisible and How To Confront The Shame You’ve Never Deserved by Dr. Margaret, January 21, 2024
• The Power of Vulnerability by Brené Brown, Ph.D., TED Talk on YouTube, June 2010
• ‘Following Your Passion’ Is Dead – Here’s What To Replace It With by Michal Bohanes, Forbes.com, Jul 5, 2018